


Nothingness

by Parachutes



Category: Fairy Tail
Genre: Angst, Dying Lucy, F/M, Natsu losing hope and Gray trying to cheer him up
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-16
Updated: 2014-07-16
Packaged: 2018-02-09 02:54:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,539
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1966251
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Parachutes/pseuds/Parachutes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lucy is dying and Natsu thinks it's his fault. Will Lucy be able to wake up before the nothing takes over?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Nothingness

**Author's Note:**

> This one is also written almost two years ago. Feel free to comment and point out any mistakes~. (:  
> Enjoy reading!

~Lucy~  
I am floating. Floating in the air, in the sea, over the mountains, in the sunlight… But in the end, everything becomes dark. Too dark to see, too dark to understand the situation I am in. Too late. Too late to think about what happened; too late to think about what is happening with me right now. And for some reason, I don’t even bother to think about it. I am… nothing. The nothingness is surrounding me, embracing me and I am gladly accepting the warm feeling, which is in fact supposed to be cold. Why should it be cold? It feels so nice, so warm, so kind… If I could, I would smile, but I can’t find my lips to do so. Where am I? Who am I? I don’t know. And don’t really care. All I can think of is the warmth that is taking me. The eternal warmth of nothingness.  
Is this death? Really? How can this be death, when it feels so comfortable?   
And then I see him. His dark eyes and his sweet smile. My head is aching, thoughts are shattered and I can’t find the pieces to finish the puzzle in my mind. But there is one thing I can understand. This nothingness may feel warm, but he is a lot warmer.

~Natsu~  
The scene that terrified me the moment it was happening, just doesn’t stop playing in my head. It won’t stop. Every time I see her falling, no, crashing. Crashing into the ground. She was slain. Slain by that damn bastard. I can still see her blood dripping on the ground. Red. Red was covering my vision, so many times that I would go crazy and start screaming from the top of my lungs. I don’t even have time to be angry with the man who cut Lucy down. The only thing I feel is… nothingness. She was taken away from me. Taken. She is gone and I don’t know if she will ever come back to me. And the worst thing is; it is all my fault. If I had just taught that bloody bastard a lesson before he could even touch Lucy, this wouldn’t have happened. Lucy would still be with me, awake, smiling, breathing, living. And now she is no more than a doll. A doll with closed eyes, lying on the bed. This isn’t Lucy anymore. Not the Lucy I know. Lucy isn’t dead. Lucy lives, because she is the liveliest thing in the world I know. And if she doesn’t live, I don’t think I can do so as well.  
I am looking at her right now, at her soft skin, her long, blond hair and her closed eyes, while I’m sitting on the chair the Master brought up here for me. I know I should go on jobs, I know I should be downstairs, picking a fight with Gray or messing around with Happy, but I just can’t. I can’t bring myself to have fun without her. Will she come back? Will she open her chocolate brown eyes and look at me when she wakes up? Will she forgive me for the fact that I couldn’t defend her? Will she be on my team again? Will we be able to go on jobs again together? All those thoughts are spinning through my mind and I hate it. I don’t like thinking, it makes me go crazy. I just want to do something, to help her, but there is nothing I can do! Lucy is fighting a battle against herself, against her strength, against her death, and I can’t even help her. I feel so terribly weak.  
Before I know it, they start to fill my eyes. Tears. The tears I couldn’t make earlier have arrived. I haven’t cried since the day Lucy was slain. I haven’t talked. I haven’t said a word.  
And suddenly, when I’m sitting her right before the extremely quite body of my Lucy, I am crying. And I do not like it. It makes me feel even weaker. ‘Lucy…’ I whisper, but my chest is aching and it is winning. I am losing against the emotions I cannot control. And I can’t stand losing.   
Suddenly I can hear footsteps coming and I curse the damn bastard that is walking towards me, even though I do not yet know who it is. They should just leave me alone.  
‘Natsu.’ Gray’s voice reaches my mind.  
‘Shut up.’ I mumbled.   
‘You should come down and rest a bit.’ That hurt. Those eight little words seem to hit something hidden in my body, because I stand up and turn myself to my black-haired rival, while I feel the heat boiling inside me. ‘Shut up,’ I say calmly, but I’m not feeling calm at all. I do not understand what’s happening to me. If I was alright, I would’ve hit Gray already, but for some reason, I don’t feel the need to do so. He just needs to keep his damn mouth shut before he shuts up. So that’s why I tell him again. ‘Shut up, Gray. You heard me.’  
‘Natsu.’   
‘Shut the hell up!’ And then I look at him, my black eyes burning, tears still streaming down my face. ‘I’m serious!’  
‘I know you are,’ Gray says. ‘But she will wake up, I’m sure she will. And don’t you think she would be worried if she saw you like this?’  
‘I don’t care.’ I talk slowly, so he can understand every word, no every letter, I say. ‘I need to stay with her. I couldn’t protect her that time, so I will now. I couldn’t be with her when she needed me before, so I will now. She will not loose her battle against death, not when I’m here!’   
‘She will wake up, Natsu!’  
‘But what if she doesn’t?’ I say, my voice trembling. I can hear Gray’s hesitation. ‘You know it too, right?’ I whisper. ‘You saw her injuries. You know she isn’t just sleeping. She was hurt badly. She might die.’  
He hits me.  
The realization comes slow, but I can understand he hit me, the moment I put my right-hand at my aching cheek and look up at Gray, whose eyes are mad. ‘Idiot!’  
‘Who’s an idiot?’ I mumble, but my voice isn’t that determined.  
‘Have faith in her, Natsu, she can fight too, you know!’  
‘I’m just afraid.’  
‘What did you just say?’  
I look at him, angry. ‘Nothing. Can you just leave?’  
‘Fine,’ Gray says. ‘But don’t overdo it. Rest a bit.’  
‘Leave,’ I mumble. ‘I can take care of myself.’  
I turn my back at him and wait. Wait for him to leave this terrible room, in which Lucy is fighting for her life, in which I can only wait and see. And then I can hear his footsteps, he is walking away from me. Good. I let out a small sigh and sit down on the chair again, while my eyes are turning to look at her again. Lucy. Believe me, I don’t know what the hell is wrong with me. I mean, she has been hurt before. Gray has. Erza has. Even Happy has. Then why am I panicking right now? Why is she on my mind, even if I turn my eyes away from her? Why am I wishing so desperately to see this girl with her beautiful, brown eyes, wide open? Why am I wishing to see her looking at me? Black eyes meeting brown ones are al I’m asking for. Please… Just let her wake up.

~Lucy~  
I want him to keep talking, to hear his voice, it doesn’t matter what kind of words. And then, the realization goes through my mind. It isn’t Natsu who has to do something, it is me. I have to open my damn eyes and look at him, and tell him of those absurd feelings I have for him! I don’t know how long they have been there, but I do know they are probably longer there then I think they are. I only realized it when that black-haired creep we where fighting with cut me down and the thought I might never see Natsu again crossed my mind. That stupid thought didn’t really please me. So once again, I try to recall the feeling I had when that happened, to find the courage to open my eyes and face him, because I know he is by my side. I cannot die right now. Not yet. I’m seventeen, not freaking ninety! This is no age for dying. So why won’t my eyes open?

~Natsu~  
She’s moving. It seems like she’s having a nightmare or something, which concerns me at first, but then, the only thing I can think of is: she’s moving. She’s alive. She’s Lucy.  
I can still do nothing but wait, but I can’t help the fact that I’m panicking. Hoping.   
‘Come on, Lucy, live,’ I whisper.  
And then, her eyes slowly open.  
Suddenly I can’t help myself anymore. The happiness is overflowing. I reach out for her and press her body against mine, I can smell her scent finally. I can finally smell Lucy again.  
‘Natsu?’ she whispers.  
‘Shhh. Don’t say a word.’


End file.
